“Relationships matter critically. Consistent relationships with caring
adults are essential for healthy development” (National Scientific
Council on the Developing Child, 2004, p. 5).
“All learning takes place in the context of relationships and is critically
affected by the quality of those relationships” (Norman-Murch, 1996).
“Human relationships, and the effects of relationships on relationships,
are the building blocks of healthy development” (National Research
Council, 2000, p. 4).
Throughout my life, relationships with my family have been at the cornerstone of my foundation. As a child growing up, my closest relationships were with both my grandmothers. I had two grandmothers, my paternal American grandmother and my maternal Israeli grandmother. Although my grandmother lived in Israel, I learned that relationships can still grow and thrive despite being thousands of miles apart. I remember saying goodbye to her when I would leave Israel, and I remember the agony I felt driving away watching her wave and cry goodbye as I sobbed. While I was growing upI have always searched for that closeness and unfortunately have never found it in my own mother. I also have a strong relationship with my father, he was more nurturing than my mother and really cares for his family. Today, my strongest and closest relationships is with both my children. They are my whole life and no other relationships can compare to the depth of love and dedication I have to them. Every relationship that matters to me today is because that person is somehow connected to my children. My father, who is an author and written many books is the most amazing grandfather. He has even written a book he dedicated for them, "Gathering Sparks." He is so devoted to them and inspires me to try and be the best daughter I can. Besides my children and family, I feel a closeness to my son's teachers and therapists who have worked with him since he was three and diagnosed with autism. Every person who has touched our life, and helped him learn and grown is a part of the fabric of our family. I have a few close friends that I have had for many years, they are very important to me. The main criteria I have for a "true" friend is the ability to be myself and know that I am not being judged. And the last and final important relationships is with my brother and sister. Although they both live far away in California and I hardly ever see them, I know that the three of us are bonded for life. My sister is six years younger but she has blossomed into a wise and spiritual adult. She gave me a very strong insight about my relationship with my mother. She said, "Shira, you have the power within you to change the dynamics of your relationship." I really have been meditating on that, and deep down, I know she may be right.
One of my main goals as a parent is that my children always know that they are truly loved, and supporting and nurturing their self-esteem and a feeling of self-worth and self-love. As an early childhood educator I realize the amazing power that a great teacher has to positively impact the life of a child.
Shira,
ReplyDeleteI love the quotes! So glad we are in a group togehter again!
I love the comment about childhood being a garden. This is true and can be positive or negative. In this garden we must place things of value in them are they will be gardens full of weeds and debris. If we take the time are educatiors and professonials in the Early Childhood Field we must understand this and act on it. Thanks for sharing!
ReplyDeleteShira,
ReplyDeleteI was truly touched by your honesty as you shared with us the important relationships in your life. As women and mothers it is interesting to reflect on how our relationships with our own mothers and grandmothers have influenced us. I was very close to my mother even though we often had major difference of opinion when I was growing up . My mother was 100% Italian. My grandparents immigrated from Italy before she was born but raised her with very strict rules and Catholic values. She was also raised to believe education for a woman was not important. She and my father parented me based on these things. I grew up during the 60's when women were truly coming into their own so we would disagree on many things. The most significant thing being the importance of education. Consequently, I was not given the opportunity to go to college after high school. It all seemed to work out inthe end. I met my husband, had a family and was able to pursue an education evenutally. My blog title - six decades and still learning is a very true staement for me !
Thank you for sharing so much about yourself. I look forward to more posts and discusssions as the term continues.
Judi